At Least I Won't Have To Scrub the Kitchen Floor For a While

I saw Dr. Takata this evening after work to get the results of my MRI.

As I sat on the edge of the examining table, she stood next to me and went over the radiologist's report and explained his findings:

• The cruciate and lateral collateral ligaments are intact. What a relief.
• Mild edema overlying the medial collateral ligament suggesting a grade 1 strain. No meniscal tear is seen. Again, a relief. But the edema means that I have an excessive accumulation of fluid on my knee. Ugh.
• Mild degenerative spurring at the medial and lateral joint margins and mild thinning of medial femoral joint compartment articular cartilage. So the spurring suggests arthritis and the thinning cartilage means... well.. thinning cartilage.
• Diffuse marrow signal abnormality relatively increased on the water field echo sequence, decreased on T1 throughout the visualized femoral and tibial diaphyses. Huh?
• 1.4 cm ovoid focus of signal abnormality in the posterior aspect distal femoral diaphyses decreased signal on T1, increased on water field echo. This is well circumscribed and is of undetermined etiology. Correlation with plain radiography and bone scan may be helpful. That means a lesion on my femur, and Dr. Takata sent me back downstairs for an X-ray.
• There is a large joint effusion. Fluid seeping into the tissue.
• The quadriceps and matellar tendons are intact. Thank God.
• Degenerative spurs at the superior and inferior postrior patella poles. Say that ten times fast.
• Prominent lateral patella translation upon a developmentally shallow trochlear groove with diffuse loss of medial and lateral facet articular cartilage and mild subchondral edema within the inferior lateral facet. So my patella moves from side to side when it's really not supposed to; and all this time I thought I had a nifty party trick. And apparently it's because I don't have cartilage where I'm supposed to, which is a really nifty trick, because I've never had any removed.
• Medial and patellofemoral ligament and lateral patella retinacula are intact. No idea what that means, but as long as they're intact, I'm happy.
• Mild prepatellar bursitis. Yea, bursitis. And I'm only 42 years old.

As a footnote, my bum knee does not make me old. Forty-two is not old -- it's young! And soon, thanks to the miracle of modern medicine, my knee will be better than new.